bryan's actions came to a real shock for me today... i noe he's trying to help me, but it really has got me thinking...
think tt im a person whu dun really strive hard to get wad i want... y? well even i dunno... mebe its myself? mebe its shyness? or wad more? bcos of such a character i alwaes find myself on the losing end...
i think i have to come clean with myself... always caring too much about face n stuff... scared tt i lose face, or be sad if i dun get wad i set out for... so for simplicity i dun strive for anything n end up not getting anything...
y am i like tt i may ask myself... was it bcos of tt 1 incident back in jc whr thr were a few times i tried a shot at something i wanted n failed? tt one of them caused me to 'lose a great deal of face'? causing me to creep into my shell of protection n not come out?
well i didn exactly crawl in... its just tt i dun dare to reach out for wad i want now... dis thing has eventually affected my life a GREAT deal... lost sooo many chances which i culd have possibly went for... not gg for it 'like a man shd do' when it comes to relationships or wadsoever... in short, wishy-washy...
think i muz wake up my idea... wise up! so much time wasted, so many opportunities lost, its really time to take things LIKE A MAN! get wad u want, PRONTO!
bryan, thanx for helping me today... it really strikes me tt we r indeed different... ure very straightfwd when it comes to getting things u want but as for me, wishy-washy me... haiz... i think i shd be more like u...
dennis, dun fake liao... u keep telling ppl to go for things they want... u give ppl advice tt u urself even find very very inspiring... y dun u do something for urself? if its wad u want, go n get it! even if thr r ppl or things stopping u, it had better not be urself! defeat urself n go on!
i hope dis time, i will really be inspired to do it... pplz, mebe i will be acting a bit funny these days, but dun bother too much abt me... its just me, fighting my inner self... i hope to emerge a better man... soon...
wanna noe wad it is abt... just ask me... think i wuld be willing to tok...